I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
