ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
