Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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