Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
