thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
