WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
