dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
did you just send me my own nude
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
