Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
