Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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