It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize