Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
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