she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
