so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
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