i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I need to calm my uterus...
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
