ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
