Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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