I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
