I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
