One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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