everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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