Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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