Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
from now on my penis is your penis
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
