the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
