does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
