Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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