Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
