This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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