I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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