I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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