What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize