Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
