we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize