We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize