Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
