you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
