you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
