i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
