just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize