and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Randomize