I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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