well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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