Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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