? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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