the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
