If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
