The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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