Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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