are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
It's never too late to be topless.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Randomize
