i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
