i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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