So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
