I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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